Saturday, June 09, 2007

she quietly wept..

in case you didn't know,

I've moved. =))

Thursday, May 03, 2007

she quietly wept..

why won't the tests ever stop?
why wouldn't Mrs Wong stop giving us more and more work when she knows we have tests and tests and tests.
I'm so sick and tired of school,
I'm starting to turn off completely.

i failed chem lecture test.
and I didn't just fail.
I failed very badly.

chinese compo.
500 word essay.
tell me how am I going to survive the night?
I doubt i'll be able to reach the word limit.

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

she quietly wept..

I feel so disappointed.
firstly, my father claims that I studied all day a bullshit,
and he wasn't happy from his tone of voice.
secondly, work's compiling up like mad.
and I was doing my work the whole day even though it was a public holiday!

maybe I am,
a bullshit.

INSECURITIES.
i thought it would never hit me.
but even the happiest woman on earth would definitely have.
I was talking to huns a few days ago on msn,
and the question he asked struck me,
"Am I happy?"
I replied,"yes"
but I know I've asked myself that question many times.
until now, I,myself, really can't come up with the answer.
Yes,at times.
but there are times.NOT.

I was studying out today at the airport,
and I saw many couples holding hands,
being lovey dovey and all.
and it kinda reminded me of tim's question.
and I wonder are they truely happy or was it just that moment?

boxun called today.
somehow I know it's just a trivial matter,
and on normal circumstances like this,
i would just dismiss the whole entire incident.
but I felt really insecure to whatever he said,
and until now,it still lingers.
it constantly pricks me every minute,every second.

maybe I've to resign to fate that I've such eccentric mood,
where it changes just like the wind.
or am I just being oversensitive.

When you truely love that someone,
you want to keep him by your side forever,
but yet you feel that you're just not important to him.
You feel that you belong to his life for only once a week, and the cycle continues..

I just feel extremely sad.

Monday, April 30, 2007

she quietly wept..

School today hasn't been all that great,
although it's Labour Day tomorrow.
I am constantly irritated by someone in class,
and I'm growing immune to it.
Is that supposed to be a good thing?
maybe eh.

Holidays.holidays.
it seems that I can never have enough.
There's always a point where you still continuously want more.
Tried so hard to feel satisfied and contented with whatever I have now,
which in fact I am,
but there's always things that are too hard to seek.

I need to lose more weight.

Saturday, April 28, 2007

she quietly wept..

this shall be my first post: no ranting about how much shopping brings me joy.=)
because i know it's not gonna bring me high at least for the next few months.
i'm such a sad case,seriously.

"but what to do?"
haha. i miss ya desmond tay!
and OF COURSE STEVEN AND ADE.
When we thought that you guys were a nuisance..
caiying is so much worst.

horrible bitch.
I really can't stand her,
but I 'll just spare you the details.=)

I don't want her to be a topic of the entry.
In hindsight, I think i was stupid to even waste my time on her.
never mind.
bimbos like her don't deserve my attention.
boo i'm sorry. =(

"angeline jolie?"
tsk.tsk.tsk.
you still have a long way to go...
stop acting smart when you're not.

Friday, April 27, 2007

she quietly wept..

I'm living such an unhealthy lifestyle that,
I no longer understand what joy really means.

when you're trying so hard already to pass your tests,
yet you have to beat all those among to be in your school's squash team,
at the end of the day,
you are so totally washed out,
you don't wanna talk about anything,
because school's always on your mind.
"What am I going to do tomorrow?" blah blah blah.

I think 80% of what I think everyday is about school.
school.school.school.
i'm starting to think of school as a drag.
I dread school.
especially those evil tests that drive you nuts,
and soon to be over the edge.

My weekends are fully booked,
sorry huns.
too many things to be done, yet not much things gets accomplished at the end. =(
Please do believe that I'm a social outcast.
I'm a nerd who thinks of work 24/7.
Even in dreams,
they haunt me.=(

i feel that I'm so far faraway from the outside world,
I'm starting to hallucinate.
me and bullshit.
okay whatever.

i'm going to turn in for the day now,
bed's all I want and desire at the end of the day.
I look forward to sleeping.
oh my, I'm such a pig, really.

and I had macdonalds for dinner.
tell me about it.
It's so sinful,
mac nuggets meal with mayo.
and large fries.
I was hungry! You can't blame me for calling macdonalds!
6777377
die,i even remembered the number.

anyway, after that,
I came home and ate some more.
Time check: 11:10pm
Suppers are sinful.
I'm never going to eat suppers again.
hopefully.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

she quietly wept..

I decided to blog now,
with this spare time before I really tune in to doing some revision.
This is so miraculous, I mean no homework at all to pass up tomorrow =)

and this is going to be a ranting entry.
so do bear with me.
Because right now, I feel immensely lousy,
and CHOKED to the fking brim with all the crap that I have purposefully planned and packed my time with.
and I'm finding myself coming home at 8pm every day,
worse,at 10 plus on an awesome friday night.
And that leaves me with about 2 hours of "free time" to do my work,
which I end up really edgy at the end of the day.
tell me how interesting my life is.
tell me about it.

Needless to say, my weekends are not spared.
the time spent on doing assignments,tutorials and plus revisions for upcoming tests seemed to be of a higher calling
compared to my daily dose of shopping during the holidays.
and that accompanies with mental exhaustion and bad temper.

dear god,
I know I've been a heartless bitch today,
especially today.
I know I've been mean but she deserves it.
If I'm a bitch, what is she?
A slut?
Who on earth pushes her friend away when she herself has no seat?!!
What's up with her?
Is she really dumb or acting ignorant?
I didn't mean to speak and think evil thoughts on how to make her life miserable.
but she's pushing it to the limit!
The sight of her irritating f*ckface,makes me irritated.
I know I've been very vulgar when it comes to this.
I'll try not to speak of them anymore,
but pms adding to it,
raging hormones,
I can't really control my emotions.

amen.

"People WILL always talk about you,
so you might as well give them something to talk about."
i don't give a shit whatever you say about me.=)

stop flirting bitch,
stop giving the pathetic face that you want people to pity you.
it's not going to work.
You're the wrong technique to flirt.
boo~